President Obama Validates My Life's Work

So yesterday was a pretty big day for me.  First of all, has anyone seen anyone this good-looking in real life before?

Those three guys are okay too.

Anyway, it was kind of funny to see these famosos because it happened immediately following a major career high.


If you want to know why yesterday was so awesome, like tearfully awesome, you need to watch this video starting at 9:40.  And then imagine you are in a room full of people who you have worked with anywhere from the last year to the last decade.  People who helped you learn about the most amazing possibilities and who believed that a single small school in Northern California could be a model for the rest of the country.  Places like Manor, Texas:





It might just be me, but didn't that sound really compelling? And you know what? What he says here? This is really happening--not just here, but in schools across the country. And don't you want your kid in one of these schools? I sure do. So to all my @newtechnetwork friends, thank you for all the work you personally have done that led to this moment for us as a national movement. For my friends who have supported me while I travel so much, I hope this clarifies the urgency that pulls me periodically away from my family.  The more we can create this kind of community, the more hope I personally have for the future of all of our communities and preparing our kids for the world that will await them.

Even if you didn't vote for Obama, pretty cool, eh?

What is Important

Sometimes when I tell people about my travels, I get a response like this "Wow that must be nice."

When I get an upgrade, when I am stuck in a town due to weather delays or cancelled flights and I stay in an upgraded suite, dine on room service or Häagen Dazs ice cream, when the car rental company gives me the newest model of a black sleek car, and when I get to skip security it does feel like I get my own little mini-vacation.  I can't pretend like being alone in a hotel room with room service is "stressful" or "sensory overload" like my house often is on a regular basis.

And yesterday at church, someone posed the question: "What is your holy place?"  and I had to admit to myself that unlike some other women whose response is "the bathroom",  I actually have a quiet and peaceful place where I spend time on a regular basis.  That is since my "no TV" policy I established a few years ago (due to excessive Seinfelding at 11 every night).

But when I sit down to look at my travel schedule and find that I am going to be away from my family for at least some portion of the week for weeks on end, I wonder if it really is nice.

My children are growing up.  My two oldest are in fact away from home already much more than I anticipated, spending time with friends, or extra-curriculars and as they grow up, I miss them tremendously.  And I wonder what long-term effect my travels will have on my children.

Will they report to their therapist that their mother was always gone and neglected them or will their sense of independence and ability to make choices be greater and healthier psychologically?

Will I look back on my life and wonder if my sense of purpose was skewed in wanting to serve so many children over serving my own brood on a regular basis or will I feel a sense of satisfaction at having done both?

Will my husband look back on our marriage as a one-sided effort or will he feel closer to me because we made a great effort to spend time together precisely because of my schedule?

If I were working for a standard for-profit industry, I feel that the moral dilemma I face would not be so complicated.  Though I doubt I would be able to recognize it, I feel that in my heart I would know that my time of jet-setting was to come to an end once my husband had a job and we had another income.

But now, I can't imagine giving up the work I am engaging in nationally and by the way being paid for it any more than I can imagine not being a mother.  It is who I have become and who I want to be--so the question becomes even more complicated.  Were I not working for pay, I would still spend hundreds of hours a month in schools, school board meetings, or some other nefarious volunteerism.

As I recently said to a co-worker, we are all busy doing a certain number of things.  Some of us do more things and do them less effectively--I am one of these individuals.  No matter what anyone says, I am certain that my effort to raise my children is less efficacious than a woman who is at home with her children full-time.  I am positive that my home would be cleaner, my medical bills more organized, my budget in better shape and my church service would be greater.  I know I would be a better intern and grad student if I weren't doing 10 other things, a more committed friend and a less needy wife--but these are not the choices I have made.

What I still can't decide is whether more is less, or, as my mind and body insist, more is more.

Hampton Inn, I will see you this evening O my Holy Place.

The Rule of a Year

For some reason, even having lived in Utah before, the rule of a year remains true.  What is the rule of a year? It takes a year to stop longing for your previous community and start feeling connected to your new one.

I suppose because Santa Barbara was so lovely and we lived there for longer than we have lived anywhere else the year was more like 15 months before I finally let go.  But it happened, the last two weeks demarcating the end of my transition into this community.

Four key events occurred that have helped me with this transition:

• Starting school has provided me with a new community among my fellow classmates with whom I will be spending the next year or so
• We had a new family move into our neighborhood/church and for some reason I thought to myself Hey! We can officially welcome new people now and not BE the new people.  The new family has their children in Spanish immersion and when we eventually bribe them to come over with a meal, I feel like we can have some friends in the cause.
• I finally made a good work transition (I moved teams about 6 months ago but finally had to let go last week in Napa when both teams were meeting at the same time and I very clearly had to physically go to another location for my new team which caused a deep sense of loss but finally some exclusive focus on my new work) which means LESS travel finally.  Like maybe even 30-40% of what I have been doing
• I was called to be a counselor in YW in my ward.  For those who don't know what that means, I will be working with 12-18 year-old girls during the young women's portion of church on Sundays and one night a week, my specific focus will be 12-13 year olds.  The president and other counselor are both working moms with husbands who have provided primary care-giving in the home, very different from what I would describe as your typical situation.  I am excited both about the opportunity to work with these young women and the leaders themselves.  It will be an additional time commitment but part of our religious belief is that when you volunteer your time to help others, you are giving a blessing of additional energy and spiritual support which I have felt for myself at other times in my life.

The combination of these four factors, culminating with the calling yesterday, has finally secured a sense of home for me in Utah.  Now I just have to hope and pray Steve doesn't get a job in Oklahoma or some other random location to pull me away from my new home.

Lie to Me

Secrets, secrets
Are no fun

Secrets, secrets
Hurt someone


When I was in college my best friend had a great line about confidentiality:  when people would say to her "If I tell you something, do you promise not to tell anyone?" she would respond "No, I can't promise that, sorry."   I would be interested in what percentage of people told her anyway.

She was kidding (kind of) it but there is something very refreshing about the idea that someone is hesitant to take responsibility for harboring a secret, making you think about what you are asking of someone when you ask them to "promise?"  It is a burden, it often forces people to lie, and is difficult to manage for those who value honesty and transparency.

In my adult life, particularly professionally, there are times where an individual may confide in me and it places me in a tough position in which I feel that weight placed upon my shoulders.  I feel like I need a line like my friend to say "Are you sure you want to tell me?" without sounding untrustworthy.

There are times where the law requires you to keep something secret, something involving employment or respecting the privacy of individuals (which makes it difficult to believe that politicians aren't lying given that they are law bound). 

I don't like secrets in any form because I don't like the game of pretending like I don't know something and people dropping general hints at me until we both discover we know the same thing and suddenly the floodgates open and more secrets are poured into my wee brain.

I am finally giving in to adulthood in which I understand the weight and consequence of revealing information and I know that the more I am involved in the inner-workings of the system, education or otherwise, the more I will know about the people and events behind the scenes.  I am working on a poker face, creating internal lines in my thoughts between those things that merely inform my thinking vs. those that can actually be shared with others, and in general treating everyone I meet as a patient who requires my discretion while the diagnosis is working its way to the public ear.

The teenage me would have loved the opportunity to be a bucket for the slop of humanity but the adult me has grown out of such things and sees it not as an opportunity to collect but a curse of knowledge.

Any suggestions on how to manage such situations?

New Job Thing

Here I am.  Chellese, they need your photography skills, I look like I have paralysis. 

Opinion please

My beautiful and delightful friend Chellese took some profile pictures for me that I can use in my professional world (I have a new position at work, thank you very much!)

I like all of them, but these two are the ones I am considering. I would like to solicit some opinions about which one I should use.

Hint: I want to look sincere, not intimidating or annoying.

Option A:

Option B:

My Conferenceness

The last picture I posted was of me on stage prior to starting a conference which I co-chaired the last few years. It was a ton of work, all life-consuming really, and those of you who have had the misfortune of being in my presence during the month of July the last three years, you know just how little else I do during that planning time. We had 1000 participants but even more challenging, we had five difference groups running completely different conferences all in the same building. Herding cats to submit agendas and logistical details in a timely fashion simply wasn't possible so we were running last minute on everything, of course. However, it is finished and I feel a deep sense of satisfaction on behalf of my wonderful organization and all the people who contributed to the success of the conference.

Those of you who have noted my absence during the summer (mental if not physical) will be pleased to hear that I am passing the baton to a co-worker who will chair it next year and I will be merely and advisor.

I am both thrilled and sad to be finished with that work but surely the time will be sucked away by some other event.

In other news, I will be traveling to Madrid in August to provide some professional development to a group of nuns interested in authentic assessment. You read that correctly, nuns. They are principals of 40 schools as part of a network. I am going to be doing this work in Spanish and I am very nervous about how that will go, but I figure anyone else would have done it in Spanish and if they are nuns than they ought to be more forgiving of my errors, no?

My only regret is that I am going alone. If anyone has some spare time I would love a little company.

Oh and last piece of news, I am writing this from my new iPad which I love to bits and pieces. If you don't have one, trés sad.

Gratitude Part II

Wednesday I had to be in Los Angeles to support a school.  It was one of those Savage Inequalities moments in which the most amazing teachers were trying to fundamentally change the culture of at-risk students and all the world has to offer them is a set of dilapidated buildings and crappy technology.  While my heart was breaking for them, I am pretty hopeful the kids are going to get the heck out of that place because the right people are there to make a difference for them.

So Steve decided to make a Disney date and come down with the kids to meet me in Anaheim after work.

It was one of my "work perk" moments in which I felt that, even though I missed Casey's karate test (1000 punches and 1000 kicks!) and singing during winter program for Gillian and Bridget, and watching Meg while Steve helped the cub scouts cut out their derby cars, I did my best to leverage my work benefits to buy their love.

Thank you Hilton Honors, for the opportunity to use free points to stay in a double room Queen suite walking distance from Magical Kingdom:

Thank you also for the cookie at check-in, hot and warm, one for each of my little family members (thanks for the one for Meg, it was too much for her and we really enjoyed finishing it off)

Thanks to some colleagues in Washington, D.C., who sent me a professional gift complete with refrigerated packaging and making me look like a hero to my kids:

A few other thanks here and there, but those will come next week after my trip to NYC.

Happy work perks to all!

Cost of Fidelity

I read an article last year that I cannot find so I am going to have to make up the content to record my brilliant epiphany before it slips my mind.

I hope I am not plagiarizing, I promise that if I could find the article, I would have simply linked it to you.

The concept is pretty simple: When you do something extremely well, you suffer in other areas.  For example:

--Fidelity to a gym schedule costs you the time

--Fidelity to a particular diet costs you the opportunity to eat other foods

--Fidelity to a particular car brand can cost you an extended drive to find parts, extra money, or only being able to take it to a particular mechanic, etc.

Get the gist?  The idea is that every commitment you make has a toll on you which is why we should make them carefully.

Fidelity is not a bad thing---those who are faithful to principles, places, or people will enjoy tremendous benefits but you must weigh before each commitment what the cost would be.

You can avoid the costs by avoiding the fidelity but then you lose the magic that the fidelity provides to you.  For example, giving up on your diet will not yield you the results that fidelity would yield so you have to choose fidelity to the food offered, or fidelity to the diet restrictions?

Setting aside the obvious ones of family, religion, and blogging, to what principles are you faithful?

On Aging...or Overworking

I can't decide if I am overworking myself or if I am just getting old.  I know not THAT old, but THIS old.  I am on my second straight week of 15 hour days.  So here is what is happening, is this as a result of age or work?

1. I don't really care what I look like
2. My hair does not behave
3. I am not motivated to lose weight to look better, just to be healthier (wha???) (see 1)
4. I don't want to eat any spicy or acidic foods.  Stuff I LOVE to eat, just makes me sick.
5. I like drinking chamomile.
6. I can't remember a lot of stuff and I have total mental freezes mid sentence
7. I watch teenage shows and feel sorry for the parents more than the kids
8. I would rather hang out with my kids than pretty much anyone else
9. I don't know what is real anymore.  Or what is true.
10. I don't want to answer the same question from someone who thinks they are the first person to ask me said question
11. I don't feel like I want to impress anyone, I just want other people to be successful as a result of my work.  This sounds more altruistic than it actually is.
12. I used the phrase "hunky dory" today.

I am somewhere wandering the hotels of Indiana, and piles of emails to go before I sleep. 

Where I Been and What I Done Learned

I am becoming a Hoosier.  Indiana for 6 days last week, back to Utahr for 3 days, Indiana again until Friday.

What I have learned:

• Indiana is quite nice this time of year, lots of lakes in the north.
• I witnessed a School Board Member say an opening prayer during a rather inspiring district rollout of service including a United Way payroll deduction campaign.
• I met a very young, sharp-looking School Board President who took time off of his busy schedule to come and support the teachers in his district during training.
• I learned from a skilled individual that listening draws people out as much as good questioning--I had to practice my listening skills and wouldn't you know it, you have to practice it to get better.  I am going to work on that tomorrow, but seriously what is awesome about it is that you remain quiet for a time period and then say one really powerful thing.  I want to become the master of that.
• I found that when people are confused, they don't understand.  
• I remembered that I was born for this job--there is nothing that brings me the level of satisfaction that my work does.  Motherhood brings me tremendous joy, but also a knowledge that I am constantly failing.  In my work, the sense of accomplishment and success that I experience while in schools leaves me with a feeling of a sustainable, real change.  I know that even if the schools don't set out to accomplish their goals, the teachers and principals are never the same.  This is a lifestyle and we make people better.  
• I discovered that I really do want my iPhone back.
• I realized that I am a connoisseur of culture. Any little moment of curiosity and I find myself invigorated by a million questions. Why don't the Amish let you take pictures?  Isn't a wagon wheel advanced technology if you lived in another era?  What justifies the ownership of a cellphone but not a gas stove?  Why are the Amish bakeries so good?  Do they have running toilets?  
• I am addicted to books and will probably drive my family to the poorhouse as a direct result of teenage fiction.
• I wish you all were on foursquare.  Do it!
• I married just the right man, at the right time, in the right place, and there is nothing in this world that makes me happier than knowing that he loves me and still finds me an enjoyable companion.  I wish he could be with me on my Hoosier adventures.  And our little chilluns in the pool downstairs in the hotel.  

My Mad Skillz

I am a one trick pony.

I have spent the last two months in a work tunnel.

At some point this year, I became so busy that I realized that I wasn't living my life, rather I was just going through the motions of what a life ought to be.

Shower? Check.
Food? Check. Check. Check.
Oh. Diet? Check.
Bathroom? Right, barely made it, check.
Kids? Ignore. Check.
Kids? Stop ignoring long enough to prevent another sibling fight. Check.
Unromantic chain restaurant dinner for Anniversary? Check.
Make time to see a friend? Check.
Call someone? Check.

I used to love to travel to see my friends, it has always fueled my energy. But over the last several months I have used all of my brain power in my work to where even seeing people I love feels like I am burdening them.

Part of the reason I am mourning the loss of Katie is because she was always so willing to listen to my work tales. I have a good story for you, btw, call me. And also weird I am sad she moved when I am not even in Santa Barbara.

I plan on emerging from this cloud in late October. If you see me before then, I am sorry if I can't generate anything of interest, but here are a few updates, to help spark a conversation if I seem lagging:

1) We are not going to go back to Santa Barbara until... August 22.

2) We are very seriously examining moving to Utah in December or March after that. We have to investigate the ramifications for remote work with an advisor and tuition stuff so it is not set, but looking like a pretty decent chance.  I don't know what that means or how we will make it happen but it is at least a more interesting topic than school.

3) I got a droid incredible, my iphone will be powered down forever once I get home, get my box, and send it off to NC for Jen. You can give me crap about it if you want, but since your phone number is probably not in my new phone, your rude texts will just be from a number, not a name so therefore removes the depth of your insult.  BTW, Words with Friends is only iphone for now.  Tres sad. I think I can play with the wireless though.

4) I had a wonderful conference, thank you. I am going to have a self-indulgent moment and let you know that it was a smashing success. A bunch of things went wrong (one thing REALLY wrong but no deets, sorry) but overall the teachers in this network are so incredible that it couldn't help but be great.

5)  We took a drive downtown Chicago last night and went to a dueling piano place where much dancing was to be had.  It was like a non-stop dancing fest with some friends that I used to teach with in Sac and it was a tremendous energy release after two months of crazy work.  I truly love the friends I made teaching and so many days of my life I wish to be back in the classroom.  There is nothing like the bond that you build with other teachers when you are in a special school, making a difference in education in the country.


If you are unlucky enough to have to see my boring self in the next few weeks, ask me about dueling pianos.

Summer Relaxation

I can't quite get into the social mode--I didn't see anyone for two days in a row and I only have five days left!  Last week was just too overwhelming for me.  Plus my BFF has not responded to any texts or emails I have sent her in the last several weeks (though I did get an invite to charadium so maybe she is just busy)

I can't really summarize what happened last week but I think I broke inside for a while.  This is an emotional job, trying to help shift people and processes, and systems-- but this story might help illuminate the highs and lows I experienced, the level of responsibility for change, and how hard it is to make an impact on so many people in such a short time.

L:  We are here to talk about classroom management (for the non-teachers, this is a phrase we often use for "kids acting bad in your class and how you handle them")
Aussie guy: Okay let's role play, who wants to practice being the teacher?
Teacher: Me, I will do it!
(Scene:  L and Aussie guy are in a student group, Aussie guy refusing to let me contribute, my body language is obviously angry)

Teacher: Hi, what is going on in this group?
Aussie guy: I am just doing all the work, like usual
Teacher: (directs herself to me): And what is your contribution to this group?
L: You are looking at it.
Teacher: (starts crying) That was really cruel
Room of teachers: (awkward silence)
L: (freaking out that the entire room is full of participants who hate me because I was mean to this teacher in a role play) Oh, I mean, my group member doesn't ever let me contribute, you know, I am really angry at HIM, you know, like I am so mad at HIM because he wouldn't take my word
Teacher: (finishes scene up pretty well considering the breakdown)
____________________
Scene wraps up and I tried to smooth it over by saying "oh sorry, I just got really into the role play, you probably remembered some awkward moments with students too, so let's figure out how to address this in our class in the fall!"
__________________
I was completely mortified for the rest of the day and felt like I needed to do something for teacher person.  I see her in the hallway and the following conversation ensues:

L:  Soooo sorry about yesterday, I felt so bad!
Teacher: (confused) What are you talking about?
L:  You know, the role play?
Teacher: Oh that was so fun!  I love to do improv acting! I take classes.

Wow.

Too bad the rest of the teachers didn't realize she was so good because check out my feedback:

"I felt that the instructor put people on the spot in multiple instances. There would also be a question of whether the instructor(s) understand adult learning theory. Part of me hopes that is the issue and that it is not a rudeness issue."

I still haven't recovered.

Travesty

This is not appropriate for a blog post but it has changed my essence to more of a blue aura so I am going to share it anyway.

Many people go through hard times in their lives and don't want to share it in public because it is so painful.  But I have heard it said that blogging your troubles can ease your worries so please forgive me for sharing something so raw and close to my heart.

My company took away my Macbook Pro and provided me with a Lenovo.

There. I said it.

People can argue that a PC is really comparable to a Mac, that they are so EXPENSIVE etc.  But to quote Michael Scott, do you know what is even more expensive?  Ignorance.

To name just a few of my personal challenges:

--My new machine is racist.  There is no way on a this laptop (other than converting your uiojklm to a ten key) to create accent marks on the web.  People say that you can do it yet no one, no forum, no helper person has been able to tell me how to do this.  Convert your keyboard it says.  Well you know what? I don't need to convert, YOU need to catch up Lenovo.  On a Mac it is opt e, ALL the time.  There is no alt+130, or alt+164 or alt+8796246

--The trackpad is from you know where.  They made it all bumpy for some kind of tactile response, but the think doesn't actually work--the scrolly feature? Yah, lame.  It does work with a rolling mouse so then I have to carry around an extra 24/7.  They threw in that red dot looking thing but it offers nothing but a Hinduiy feeling.

--The search feature, while far superior to the old version of Windows, only allows you to search in that ONE folder, not your whole machine by default like in my old (three years old) Mackypoo.

--The cursor just kind of has a mind of its own.  It does not bend to my will and half the time it only pretends that it is around where you think it is but when you start typing you have jumped the page.  Wha?

I could go on and on but I will end with two essential key points:

-The Lenovo machine I have is supposed to be highly reviewed, fast, etc.  But guess what? the outside of this machine looks exactly the same as the model designed SEVEN years ago.  Catch up people!  This is the age of design.

--When the machine is closed, I can't turn it over and push a button to see my battery life.  SUCH a ripoff.

Oh and btw, this machine broke the first week I had it and I have to open it with a credit card to get the spring to open.  The "TLC package" that our IT team bought for me to "make up for the fact that I won't be able to use the genius bar" has been unable to address the matter for three weeks.  Three weeks.  Backorder.  And they didn't even check it out to see if I needed that particular piece.  If this were an Apple product, I would have had the entire machine replaced with a big fat sorry from a very adorable twenty something apple sales guy within minutes.  A profuse apology even. 

So once again, please accept my apology for sharing something so intimate and believe me there are a lot of details I left out. 

I would appreciate if if you wouldn't try to talk me out of my passion for Apple, Inc. by referencing their bullying of Adobe or how they have now become more capitalist profiteers than Microsoft whom they previously accused of being overly capitalistic and profiteerish.  I don't really care about their politics, I just want my machine back. 

Ground Control to Major Tom

Recently I have discovered that my cerebral operating system has limited space. This was always a known issue, but it has come to a peak lately.

Someone shared an article (via twitter you haters who haven't learned the value yet) regarding the need for digital natives to meditate. I didn't actually read the article because I am so constantly multitasking that I just read summaries and then pass on info to people.

Recent studies have determined that people who multitask do each task less efficiently. It is like they know me.

Forgive the analogy for the non-tech types, but I just realized that the Operating System analogy is very powerful. How is my brain like an operating system?

1. It begins to run less and less efficiently when certain programs are running in the background. Programs like listening to my children fight, or having to work on my expense reports which keeeel me.

2. I always, I mean always, have 2-3 programs going. I often have a song in my head (or maybe I am singing it) and I maintain simultaneous thoughts and repeat conversations in my head.

3. If my brain has been engaged for a long time, it begins to be overwhelmed and I need to shut down. My friends in college used to accuse me of randomly picking up the phone and calling someone mid-conversation. Controlling those impulses is key for me because I still have this habit. Someone asks a question and I immediately pick up my phone, only now I use texting or a browser to solve my issues instead of actually calling someone.

I have recently discovered, sadly, that I can't seem to concentrate very well when I am having conversations with people one-on-one. I can't complete a thought coherently, I am not engaged in many conversations, etc.

My solution to this:

1. NO screen time for set periods of the day. No phone, no computer, no nothing.

2. MUST workout. I am trying to go religiously three times a week. The other days if I can go on a walk, even better. I seem to be able to concentrate on conversations better during that time too so if you want to talk to me about something you should definitely go on a walk with me.

3. When I get in the car, I can't turn on the radio or play with my phone for at least part of the drive. I should be using this time to converse with whomever is actually IN the car.

4. I need to create a "to do" list. Instead of doing five things partway, I need to set two simple things I am going to complete each day. This means I need to actually create said list. I am looking for an app for that btw.

5. Meditation. I haven't done this effectively yet, but I plan on at the very least, trying to pray more often and focus my brain in that way. Maybe that is part of the reason why we ought to do so.

6. Getting enough sleep. Megs still thinks it is okay to get up in the middle of the night and I am often at diminished capacity. I have no resolution for this right now but hopefully it will get better soon.

What other strategies do people have for brain restart, or at least hibernation?

Me, this week

Training.

Wish me luck for my big event on Wed.

-From Grand Rapids, MI.

Transitions

I have had too many transitions in the last three weeks:

Indiana.
Home.
Steve gone.
Sonora.
Home.
Napa.
Home.

Steve leaves Friday for Illinois (Mormon Historical Association Conference) and comes back Sunday while I leave Monday morning for North Carolina.

I have decided that when I am "transitioning" I lose focus on the joy of the journey. I find no joy in coming home after a long trip and doing housework/getting back into the groove makes me angry. I have no idea why.

So since these transitions are not going away anytime soon, I need to come up with a strategy for coping. This is what I have so far:

1) Plan an outdoor activity for the day I get home. If we are out with the kids doing something fun, I can jump right into the enjoyable part of being our family without the drag of feeling like I need to clean.

2) Focus on just playing with the kids and ignore housework (puzzles, reading, crafts, etc.)

3) Come home and focus on doing the cleaning stuff I haven't done for a while--like the stove, behind the fridge, etc., so I can feel that "deep cleaning" satisfaction that you get from those moments.

4) Buy new rap songs on itunes on Fridays so that when I get home I can play it really loudly while I am doing the chores

5) Get through the day and then call friends for a dessert night out

Any other suggestions? Don't say "Sit in your bed and take naps while waking up periodically to read a book and yell at the kids" since that doesn't work. Sadly, I know this.

Downsizing

8 people lost their jobs in my organization yesterday due to "restructuring" and it was referred to as "pruning" to allow for new growth.

If you have to be laid off, does Dec 1 sound like a good time to anyone?

Merry Christmas to those guys.

Por favor

So the whole flat world thing has me a little irked this morning.

I got up at 4:20 this morning in order to shower so I could be presentable for a video conference but the teacher never appeared online nor did he call in to the conference number. He could not know that it took a herculean effort to drag my sorry carcass out of bed this morning due to a late bedtime for lil Meg and then getting up in the middle of the night to feed her since she woke up to the sounds of Gillian crying with her own issues at 1:20 am.

The good news is that I can catch up on my blogging before I head up north to Sonora for Turkey Day. I am looking forward to the tryptophan coma that I hope to enter shortly after consuming large portions of turkey and cranberry. Especially because this year I will be skipping dessert. I can't believe I just said that.

We are leaving in the am and hopefully stopping to see a few folk who I still need to contact. Emmy and Tara?

Here are two quick pics I took in my ghettofab living room studio this weekend:

Post D-day

The due date is excruciating because you have to sit around and wait with nothing else to do while disappointing people.

The day after? Awesome! Because you can do whatever the heck you want and no one cares. My agenda today:

- Watch episodes 1-8 of season one, Prison Break (my favorite show and it would be yours too if you ever saw Wentworth Miller)- all the violence of 24 without the neo-cons around

- Put all my work emails into a folder so when I am out all the email in my inbox will be manageable when I come back

- Watch the Ballad of Sarah Palin

- Reread most of Breaking Dawn (yes I had already read Twilight- Eclipse in the last week)

- Read Midnight Sun (is it just me or is that her best one yet aside from a need for some editing?)

- Take a shower

-Go to open house and give an impromptu schpiel for the parents in English and 'spañol.

-Eat cheesecake

-Eat ginger lemon cookies from Costco

-Put together the new Pack N Play to motivate said child to be born already

So yeah, awesome day and I expect tomorrow to be equally mindless. If only I had episodes 9-12 from netflix already...