Junior High Romance

My son is a nice kid.

He is 13.

He has never once expressed an interest in girls and I have never asked.  But this summer, a cute little girl at church came up to me during a campout we were on and the following conversation ensued:

Girl:  Do you know who your son likes?

Me:  No.  We don't talk about these things.

Girl:  I know.   I know who he likes.

Me:  I don't want to know.  It would be too embarrassing.  He wouldn't want me to know.

Girl:  Me.  He likes me.

Me:  Lalalalalalala {covering ears}

Girl: No, he does, for real.  I know because he was getting mad at his friend for chatting with me on facebook.

Me: LALALALALALALALA

Girl:  It's true.  Seriously.  Isn't that cute?

This was my official maturation as a mother.  I don't know why I am not the kind of mom who wants to know these things, but I just can't handle it.  My mom constantly, constantly asked if I liked boys.  I always had some boy I liked, never told her.  As a kid, I kind of felt like it was none of her business, and as a mom, I feel the same way.  Not my business.  Unless you want to try to sneak her in your window at night, then it definitely would be my business.

So this same little girl gave a talk at church on Sunday and I noticed that his friend in front of him kept turning around and they were exchanging glances.  I kept looking for some distracting item in the row and then I realized that it was the girl.  The girl! 

So this is the conversation that happened yesterday on the couch:

Me:  Son, do you like girls?

Son:  {no hesitation} yes.

{pause for information note: this child NEVER says yes outright unless he is arguing with his sister.  He answers nearly every question with an "I dunno" so for him to say yes is a resounding YES}

Me:  Do you like A girl?

Son: {no hesitation} yes.

Me: Does she know?

Son: I don't know, I think so.

Me:  What would you do if she liked you back?

Son: That would be awesome?

Me:  But what would you DO?  I mean, what does that even mean?

Son:  Mom, I wouldn't do anything, I am 13.

That's right son, that is right.  

But... I feel so... strange!  And now my little girl wears a bra that she can actually fill and started going to the mall and referring to boys as guys and I think when did this happen?  When did my children become people?  People who like other people?

It is both what I have always wanted and what I have feared.  I wanted them to grow up, but not to start to LIKE people!  I don't want them to have a crush because it means inevitable heartbreak--either the object of the crush will not like them, a devastating blow when someone reveals the information as your well-intentioned friends are (Landee, you know who you are) or the person will return the feelings and it will end in some relationship that will go in the direction in some other hormonal-driven thing.

Can't they have more innocent crushes like my junior high crush?

I don't remember thinking about this when we decided to have children, but I am in this for the long haul and I am woefully unprepared.  I will end with an original poem:

 

Oh to the children of the junior high

All your crushes are the apple of some mommy's eye

If and when you decide to reject some love offer

Remember the fragility of the heart that doth proffer

Should you decide to accept some little girl or boy

Just keep in mind that it isn't the real McCoy

Please remember this time in your life is just for harmless fun

Or I will have to change my mind about owning a gun