Due to an endless number of days with a headcold I have finally pinpointed what it means to have four children: cacophony.
See when my head does not ache, I have a high tolerance for sound. I was a high school teacher, after all, and what many of you don't know is that I actually team-taught in a classroom with an English teacher (I was Social Studies) and we had a very large classroom full of students. Our largest class was 54 students and we operated that place like a controlled zoological experiment. It was amazing what we could pull off in there but it is not for the light-hearted. Training students to work independently, collaboratively, and creatively yet pay attention while a teacher is up in front of the class for a few minutes here and there, well, that took a lot of...energy.
Having said all of this, the chorus of four voices to whom I have given birth, especially with the newest addition of a rather pitchy soprano can sometimes outdo even the group of 54 teens. Additionally I think I could always feel sorry for those misbehaving students, blaming their parents of course for their lack of respect or gratitude. Who can I blame for my children's lack of respect or gratitude but myself?
If you are not familiar with this particular symphony let me enlighten you:
During church, whilst attempting to listen to the speaker, I hear all of these things at once, in no particular order:
--girls on floor alternating giggling and fighting over markers
--son, alternating between "I love you mommy" and "I'm tired/hungry."
--baby, alternating between crying and giggling at her brother
--me saying "honey, tell them to be quiet"
--husband saying "it isn't bothering me, do you want to trade places?"
--"Can I have a drink of water?"
--"Can I have some of your gum?"
--"Will you play the dot game with me?"
--"Why do I have to put my shoes on?"
--"Why do we have to sit in our seats?"
I am used to this chorus, as familiar with it as I am Beethoven's Ninth played for the billionth time in a movie, but when I am sick, it sounds like one of the instruments broke and the rest are severely out of tune and I just can't make it stop.
So tonight when the family was acting out Mozart's Eine Kleine Nachtmusik:
--"I don't want to do my chores"
--"That was my chore Saturday"
--"I am never going to ever clean the toilet when it is my turn"
--"Cry, cry, cry"
--"I have pinworms"
--"Let's play charades"
--"How do I know when my prayers are answered?"
--"Can I go to Samuel's house after dinner?"
--"I don't like this food"
--"Can I have another fiddy pounds of sugar?"
It dawned on me that THIS is what Pres. Beck meant when she said "Be on for the swing shift, it is when your kids need you the most." She said that in our regional meeting so hopefully lightening won't strike on me for having published it here.
So I took some herbal tea (Stash Peppermint if you are ever in need of calming) and put it on my Pandora station (Deb Talan) and folded laundry. It felt good. The headache leftover from my teeth cleaning (people don't wait four years to do this just cuz you are too lazy to find a new dentist) stuck around but I was somehow able to turn that symphony back into something beautiful in my head.
It doesn't hurt that the kids are all asleep and the harmony of their voices is reduced to a quiet breathing sound.
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ReplyDeleteAh, children sleeping, that is music to my ears. Now the music may be a little quieter with Holden's tonsils removed. He was a LOUD snorer.
ReplyDeleteMy kids all know that song too. All of them and a lot more.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, sleeping children always changes your perspective on things.
I don't have much to add to that except that it was a great read. Very talented writing there Queso.
ReplyDeleteTis true Flem. This was a fave of mine. And I'm pretty convinced my sensitivity to noise is on the top of my list of "why to not have more kids".
ReplyDeleteThe only sound here is me laughing at this post.
ReplyDeleteI have a low tolerance for noise, especially in the evening. If my kids hover around me, making noise, I just say "I think it's bedtime" and they scatter like cockroaches.
ReplyDeleteI don't know how you can write something not only coherent but highly entertaining when you have a headache.
ReplyDeleteHaving kids has made me almost obsessive about noise. I think it's because on the one hand you're very attuned to their noises--like monitoring where in the house they are and if those are happy or sad or hurt sounds. And then on the other hand you're constantly bombarded with their nosie--much of which is meaningless blather. Haley loves to sit at the bar while I'm making dinner and sing these sweet little songs in the most ear-splitting falsetto.
ReplyDeleteI love the "swing shift" comment--so true! While most of the world is chilling or winding down from 4-8 it's my most challenging, energy-consuming time of the day. I always have to force myself to take a break in the afternoon so I can be revved up for it. (Which is why I'm visiting you here now. )